We have a tendency to downplay our family of origin wounds; neglect, shame, abuse and/or accidental traumas but they take a toll on our nervous systems. Events usually happen so fast our bodies do not have the time to process what happened and return to balance. Many times, our body did not get the memo we lived and are now safe. It stores the fear and helplessness related to the event which causes tension, panic, anxiety, overwhelm, over-reacting to situations, anger, irritation, suspicion, depression and nightmares.

Developmental trauma occurs when children develop in the midst of family dysfunction such as neglect, inattentive or fighting parents, abuse, divorce, sexual abuse, or death in the family. This affects the nervous system's capacity to regulate causing the body to feel unsafe even later into adulthood.

In addition, children are highly perceptive but inaccurate interpreters about what family events mean. Children make up stories and blame themselves about family problems--taking on the shame. These buried subconscious beliefs and emotions stick with children into adulthood causing symptoms. It does not feel safe in our own body and environment so we develop strategies to cope. Many times these coping skills turn into addictions or obsessions. They may distract us for a while but then they become the more glaring problem. These include excessive eating, alcohol, drugs, perfectionism, acting out sexually, isolating, over-working, attaching to unhealthy relationships, avoiding close relationships or just trying too hard to control everything. We've long buried the original disruption but the beliefs are stored in our subconscious just waiting for the right event to trigger a painful reaction in us. Talking alone does not always help. Many of us have talked about our troubles, pain, and history to anyone who would listen. We need to feel it with compassion and let it go so we can convince ourselves we are safe.

Below are some of the modalities I will utilize in sessions.


Internal Family Systems Therapy


Internal Family Systems (IFS) is an evidence based approach that works with aspects of our personality within our mental system. Have you even noticed when someone pushes your buttons your personality changes? It is almost like we become a different person. It may be easier to notice this in other people. Have you ever noticed friends or family members may be friendly and loving sometimes but other times they act irrationally and seem to lose the ability to reason? Later, you notice another aspect of his or her personality that feels badly and may apologize. We all have different aspects of ourselves - fun loving, caretakers, thinkers, trapped parts, angry critics, get the job done parts, some that act out and others that feel guilty about this behavior. It's as if we have a team inside of us that argues with each other about how to handle life situations. Have you ever noticed these inner conflicts within yourself? Do you ever act in ways that your mature self regrets? Maybe later, when you feel more like yourself, you wonder why you over reacted. These aspects of ourselves are often in conflict with each other and with our core Self. Our higher Self is described as curious, confident, and compassionate, creative, calm, connected and courageous and knows how to handle life's challenges. The Self is the whole person that is at the core of every individual. IFS focuses on healing the wounded parts and restoring mental balance and harmony by changing the dynamics that create discord among these aspects of ourselves. IFS also strengthens our consciousness to our higher (spiritual) Self to lead our lives in more satisfying ways.

WHAT TO EXPECT

IFS therapy incorporates feeling body sensations to identify and understand the specific aspects of self that make up your internal mental system. Once we identify these parts, we listen and acknowledge our individual part's needs and help them to unburden suppressed emotions and beliefs that no longer serve them. When the Self makes contact with wounded parts- healing can take place. The Self can listen to each part, ask what they need and assist them to unburden old belief patterns and painful emotions. This makes room for new healthy and fresh ways of seeing the world (from a higher perspective).

HOW IT WORKS

1) Free the parts from their extreme roles

2) Restore trust in the Self

3) Coordinate and harmonize the Self and the parts, so they can work together as a team with the Self in charge.

Somatic Experiencing

Somatic Experiencing (S.E.) is considered a bottom up approach because it focuses on the body and nervous system and its integral role in mental and emotional health. In S.E. we focus on tracking sensations and feelings that lie underneath symptoms and uncover the body's procedural habitual patterns. These maladaptive patterns can cause pain, discomfort, anxiety and urges that fuel our thoughts and actions. By working from an embodied, mindful and experiential level, we speak the language of the nervous system and help it move from anxiety, hyper-alertness, and/or shut down to balance, resiliency, and health.

In many cases, the effects of traumatic events or long term stressful situations don't go away once the trigger is no longer present. Even after the threat is gone, one's body and nervous system will stay charged, tense and alert and keep secreting unnecessary stress hormones. Until one can work with the language of the nervous system and help it move from a sympathetic aroused state to a parasympathetic rest state.

SE TOUCH

SE Touch is a part of Somatic Experiencing (SE), a type of therapy developed to treat trauma and regulate the nervous system. I use touch to more directly intervene with the client's nervous system.

Somatic Experiencing Touch adds another component to this modality. SE Touch helps the nervous system to reorganize and return to a more regulated natural flow. It lowers cortisol levels, reduces anxiety and stress. It alleviates depression, improves immune function, reduces pain, enhances attentiveness, decreases blood pressure and calms the heart. Touch is a language of compassion, helping us bond and connect with other humans. This component is especially effective for healing the preverbal stage of life. SE touch is also effective in facilitating the completion of thwarted self-protective responses that remain stuck in our bodies. With every event that was too fast or too much for our nervous systems to handle there is a natural self-protective response that wants to complete.